According to sources, millions of younger Republicans have spent most of their lives viewing Reagan a stalwart of conservative principles, and many were “horrified” to learn that the former president illegally sold weapons to Iran, declared amnesty for 2.9 million illegal immigrants, costarred in a movie with a chimpanzee, funneled aid to Islamic militants in Afghanistan, and suffered from severe mental problems.
In the wake of the GOP’s revelation, Congress has passed bills to rename Reagan National Airport and the USSRonald Reagan aircraft carrier in honor of Eisenhower. A number of potential 2012 Republican presidential contenders have also rushed to reframe their agendas in terms of “Eisenhower ideals” while distancing themselves from Reagan.
“It’s absolutely mortifying to suddenly realize that the man you had long credited as a champion of fiscal conservatism actually tripled the national debt and signed the largest peacetime tax hike in U.S. history,” said former House Speaker Newt Gingrich, adding that he was ashamed to learn that the man he once called his hero stood by silently while the AIDS epidemic exploded. “Frankly, I can’t even believe that fucker had the balls to call himself a conservative.”
“But we must move beyond this mess and look ahead toward our country’s future, a future much like the one envisioned by the great Ronald Reagan,” Gingrich added. “Oh, sorry—force of habit.”
The misplaced adulation of Reagan has reportedly affected more than just Republican rhetoric, and seems to have had an impact on policy. Former president George W. Bush told reporters he “honestly thought” everyone wanted him to follow in Reagan’s footsteps, which led him to emulate the 40th president’s out-of-control deficit spending, fealty to the super-rich, and illegal wars.
Some Conservative friends of mine describe Reagan as “Ronaldus Magnus”.
I was talking on DailyPaul a couple of weeks ago about how Reagan was a big-government liberal interventionist. The Reagan Myth is incredibly ridiculous.
Eisenhower was no angel either.
Eisenhower foreign policy:
- Pick a dictatorship
- Flip a coin
- If heads give aid, if tails fund an even more violent revolutionary to overthrow him.
- KILL DA COMMIES
- Hope this didn’t tick anyone off.
I saw this post the other day. Really good one by the Onion, rarely do they disappoint.