Guy A: “Hey buddy, isn’t that your car over there?”
Guy B: “Yeah. So?”
Guy A: “So someone’s breaking into it! Look!”
Guy B: “Well, that’s the price I pay to live in a civilized country.”
Guy A: “Huh? Now he’s hot-wiring it. You just gonna stand there?”
Guy B: “I’m willing to contribute to this great society we live in.”
Guy A: “What are you talking about? You’re being robbed!”
Guy B: “Don’t be silly. It’s not robbery. It’s the will of the people.”
Guy A: “What people? Aren’t you the one who paid for the car?”
Guy B: “Yeah, but the guy who’s taking it is serving the common good.”
Guy A: “How does that guy stealing your car help the common good?”
Guy B: “Well, I trust he’ll do useful things with my car.”
Guy A: “Weren’t you going to do useful things with it?”
Guy B: “Yes, but if we each just used our own stuff, there would be chaos!”
Guy A: “Well, you can trade stuff, but that guy just stole your car!!”
Guy B: “No he didn’t. By living on this block I agreed to lose my car.”
Guy A: “So anyone can swipe your car, and you don’t mind?”
Guy B: “Don’t be silly! Only the local carjacker can do it.”
Guy A: “So whoever decides to be a carjacker is allowed to rob you?”
Guy B: “Well, if I don’t like it, I can try to appoint a new local carjacker.”
Guy A: “What would be the point of that? The new guy would still steal your car!”
Guy B: “Yes, but he would be representing me while stealing my car.”
Guy A: “What does that mean?! How does a thief represent you?”
Guy B: “Because I can ask him to do good things with my car.”
Guy A: “And will he listen to you, and do what you want?”
Guy B: “Well, so far they never have. But I keep trying.”
Guy A: “Why would you even try?”
Guy B: “You have to participate. Otherwise you can’t complain.”
Guy A: “Yes I can! I’m not the one claiming that I should be robbed!”
Guy B: “You have to work within the system.”
Guy A: “What system? The system made up by the carjackers?”
Guy B: “Of course. It’s the civilized thing to do.”
Guy A: “Why not oppose carjacking altogether?”
Guy B: “Don’t be silly. Every town has to have some carjacking.”
Guy A: “So you’re just going to keep putting up with being robbed?”
Guy B: “It’s not robbery. The carjackers have my implied consent to do it.”
Guy A: “What? You told them they could take it?”
Guy B: “No, but by living here, that counts as me giving them permission.”
Guy A: “Who says so?”
Guy B: “The carjackers. They say being here counts as agreeing to be robbed.”
Guy A: “And you believe them?!”
Guy B: “Look, if you don’t like being robbed, leave my neighborhood!”
Guy A: “But I’m saying that you shouldn’t be robbed!”
Guy B: “Yes I should, you wacko, fringe kook! Now go away!”
Very clever. Would read again.
pretty good…
lol… i really liked that.
Lol, nice.
Someone should post this on reddit (and share the link).
I thought that was really well done.
This. Someone think of a really catchy title. Also, make it a self-post and include the text in the OP comment. (That guy’s website will not fly there.)
The Social Carjack. [:P]
On reddit, there are ways to phrase the title so that people will click, and also so that people who would usually kneejerk respond against it will have an extra measure of tolerance. A little comedy and/or sarcasm also helps. I wish I knew how to craft the magic formula. It’s a valuable skill for getting eyeballs.
Here’s a few suggestions:
“How government works”
“My politician carjacked me and I’m totally cool with it!”
“Help! My representative jacked my car!”
“Barack Obama jacked my car”
…etc. I think sensationalistic/preposterous titles work best.
I liked “I’m allowed to rob you” even more.
Love it
But I’m guessing… you’re still a statist?
I think it could be as low as 1% active withdrawal rate to catalyze a new revolution.
ROTFL!!!
It could be. I would love to see it tried.
Ofcourse.
Carjackers should get a job.
Pathetic.